


Maculate Conception

by Pandora_Imperatrix



Category: Naruto
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Baby Fic, F/M, I'll not tag all relationships because it's bad for the people looking for fic, a lot of them will show up most of them canon but not all of them, also really small chapters, and about the ships, and rude cracky humor, and there will be a lot of gay and bi sex mention, and you can count on a lot of swearing, but jfyi Sasuke and Sakura will appear a lot, but there will be sweet hurt/comfort and romance too I'm not a monster, it supposed to be a drabble series
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2019-05-19 01:40:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14864231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pandora_Imperatrix/pseuds/Pandora_Imperatrix
Summary: In Sugetsu's opinion it's still a miracle even if Karin is far from holy or a virgin.





	1. The one about fucking a foot

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Puking, blowjob and foot fetish.

The idea was to try to be romantic for once and wake him up with a blowjob. It worked, for a while. Well, his dick was in her mouth a while ago and he was awake now, so it worked alright?

“Karin, are you ok?”

She wasn't.

She got up, yikes! Too fast. It made her feel worse. She sat on the bed, her teeth clenched shut.

With her peripheral vision, she saw him get up too, but instead of sitting next to her, he got out of the bed and stood in front of her, his hands reaching out to her body but unsure if he should touch her.

“Answer woman!”

Well, he bloody deserved what came next, she obviously wasn’t ok, his was a fucking stupid question, and the look of worry on his fucking stupid face was no excuse, so, when she tried to answer with something snappy all that came from her mouth was puke.

“Fuck! My foot, Karin!”

And if her insides weren’t trying to rearrange themselves she would have laughed, because she had, in fact, once, fucked his foot.


	2. The one about brilliant ideas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Blowjob mention, blood mention, syringe mention and a lot of swearing.

“So, lemme get this straight” Karin snorted, she knew he liked to sleep around and it wasn't always women, she had this vivid memory of running into him giving Sasuke a head and how she almost busted into flames of pure rage that day “you think you are pregnant?”

“Yes, we’ve been over this a thousand times, I know you are thick, but I didn’t reckon it would be that much.”

“Shut up, and you think it is _mine_?”

He was pacing and ruffling his hair was he walked from one side to the other, sometimes throwing some of the lab’s paraphernalia on the ground unmeaningly.

“Don’t tell me to shut up, asshole!” She retorted angrily, the rubber she was trying to tie around her arm singlehandedly snapping away from her grip and falling on the floor.

“No, this is you fault, you said, and I remember it well, ‘you don’t have to worry about a condom,” she rolled her eyes to the ridiculous high pitched voice he made, it sounded nothing like her, “I keep everyone monitored for diseases and you aren’t fertile anyway'. You said Orochimaru fucked up my DNA so much that I wouldn’t be able to breed and that you were on the pill anyway!”

“And that was all true! I did think that you were sterile!”

Well fuck that rubber, he was being so successful on raising her blood pressure that she might not even need that thing, but she wondered if her hands would be steady enough to handle the syringe and the needle.

“But you don’t know if you are really preggo anyway, right? This all can be you making a huge thing of a funny sushi. You just have to pee on a stick or something, isn’t it? Why aren’t you peeing on a stick?”

“I’m sorry but I couldn’t find a drugstore in the middle of a forest that we use for hiding, and I don’t think that the nearest village one does delivery to creepy secret caves.”

“So what _are_ you doing?”

“You are _really_ stupid, aren’t you? Genuinely. I really hope if I am truly pregnant that the kid doesn’t end up being another fish brain like you. I’m trying to draw blood for a lab test, moron.”

“But how do you know it’s mine anyway? You were so sure I was shooting dust.”

“Because I do!”

“And how is that?”

“I just do alright? It is yours, I get that you don’t want to have anything to do with it because right now neither do I. I didn’t plan it! I didn’t want to get pregnant. Do you think I woke up and was like, you know what would be a great idea? To get pregnant from a failed human experience freak that I fuck sometimes when I’m bored but still hate the guts for the most of it and guess what would be even more amazeballs? Do it around a guy that I love and respect but is known for experimenting on children.”

His anger was gone after that, he was running only on frustration.

“But you said you were on pills!”

“I wasn’t! Okay? I wasn’t for months.”

“Why?”

She felt small and fragile, and by answering she felt like she was giving a huge chunk of her pride away.

“Because it was only you. There was no one else.”


End file.
